Thursday, October 21, 2010

If you have extra, give it to me!

So everyone is talking about the billion dollar home of Mukesh Ambani - Antilia in Mumbai.

So much that it has its own wikipedia entry.

I have a few questions to ask him, though:

1. What you have constructed there is more like a Black and Scholes Mathematical Model - part ugly, part beautiful. Only in your case, this building is a little bit more on the uglier side. Who gave you the idea? Were you drunk on petroleum when you approved the design?

2. I don't want to get into the moral thingies like how many hungry the amount you spend on that would've fed, but honestly, do you think this is actually worth it? I mean, it doesn't have trees! And those indoor/hanging gardens could not be considered. The way you might've climbed trees in the ancestral village, will your grandchildren even know what a tree is? Oh, wait, will you show them on the big screen of your mini theatre. You'll still not have crazy peacocks dancing in your backyard, because you *wont* have a backyard.

3. How will you keep lizards away from your mansion? If you have a sureshot solution, please contact me on the mail address in the profile. No spam, please.

4. Your parking place has space for 160 cars. And you also have a helipad. Why did you leave your planes away? Won't they feel left out? Why didn't you build a hangar for your aircraft also? Am sure you could've easily got a few more floors for it.

5. Will you be using a Tata Nano car to move around in your house? It seems like quite a good idea to me. It will fit in your elevators, too. After all, covering the whole house on foot will be quite a task, and am sure wont be able to finish it off in one day! :p

6. How many hours in a day are you going to actually spend in your home that you spent so much on it? Or was it your ego?

7. Have you planned how will you divide your property between your kids? Once bitten, twice shy. Am sure you know how hard it can be for brothers who are at war over property - you've had first hand experience! And am also sure that your kids would be smart enough to learn from your mistakes. But on second thoughts, your this residential property will stand tall like it is for years to come - because *no one* wants to buy ugly houses.

Sigh, I could actually go on and on about whining about the ugliness of your new house, but I must stop it here, because here comes the most important question, if you have so much extra money to spend on something like that, how about giving some of it to me. Then I can go and get myself the new phone and camera I've been eyeing and also a couple of extra million rupees in my bank account wont hurt... :)

ps - I'll take care of the taxes - after all, I am the shattered accountant in the making.

*dramatic exit*


The DJ is here :D said...

That felt sooo nice Ninu! OMG!! I've read a blogpost after like A-G-E-S and totally worth it!

anoop said...

i'm sure you are hoping that the guy will read your post and actually gift you some money. well, nothing wrong in that hope :P

The DJ is here :D said...

and yeah btw, if you get the transfer of a few millions in your account, please transfer JUST 1 to mine! heheheh :P

anoop said...

bleh, its really an eyesore. cant we do a PIL on it - for the sake of preserving beauty at least.

Vish Santhakumar said...

ROFLMAO!! Here is a prediction.. you are gonna be one damn good shattered accountant :D

Nirwa Mehta said...

@ DJ

HAHAHAHAH! So good to see you back! Am so glad to have you around the place.. :) you are missed *you-know-where*

@ Anoop

:D asha amar hai, as they say! :P and it truly is an eye sore! :P

@ Vish

:D :D thankew thankew! :)