Friday, April 4, 2014

Waking up and feeling sad for no reason?

How does that feel?

It feels, well, sad.

You don't know why you're sad. And you have no reason to be sad. But you are.

Maybe you do have a reason.

You have a reason that for the first time, you tried talking about the demons you've been fighting since you were a child.  They may not be too big, or as important to other people, but for someone who has been facing them, they were and are a huge deal for you.

You always knew no one would understand, mostly because no one tried asking what is wrong with you. Because there is no reason for anything to be wrong with you - you are just a child, how devastating your life could have been anyway?

And for the first time, when you try to open up a dialogue, you don't get any response.

You are left to deal with your issues on your own. However trivial they are.

Doesn't matter that in your eyes your life is worthless.

And that you have always felt unloved, uncared for.

Because it is always in your mind.

Yes, it has always been in my head.

Denial, not laughter, is the best medicine.

2 comments:

Shah said...

Ummm try Vitamin B12, vegetarians lack it.

Kiran Rishi said...

I can relate to this blog post. Waking up sad, going to sleep sad. Perhaps not "sad" but more like unhappy. Feeling like your life is worthless is a terrible feeling that doesn't go away but gets worse with the passing of time.