Sunday, January 5, 2014

The year that was and the year that will be

As cliched as the opening of this blogpost, I had been wondering on writing up a yearly round up of sorts since a while.  But never got around doing it.

Why should we even celebrate new year? It's just a change of date.  Spoken like a true hipster who doesn't celebrate new year because it is too mainstream.  Apparently it is just a date change which we humans invented.

Dude, for that matter, everything was created by humans only.  Including your birthday. So please don't celebrate that also.  Oh, wait, you don't do that anyway, because you're sad  you're getting a year older.  And why should you celebrate one year closer to death. 

It is because of people like these that people like us need therapy.  Anger management so we don't punch them in their face for being incredibly depressing.

Anyway.  2013 was a good year.  I got a job, which I love.  I got to see my name in print, which was awesome.  I saved up a little and got the gadgets I wanted (iPad Air and Nexus 5, I'm now starting a fund - Help Nirwa Buy Mac Fund, kindly donate generously) which was fabulous and I am in love with both the gadgets.  I also started taking my health seriously.  Nothing feels as good as sweat dripping off forehead on goodhair day.  Which eventually turns into hair-so-greasy-let-me-tie-them-in-braid day.  I started making conscious efforts to be happier.  If a person is drawing me down, I tried to push them away from me.  I stopped letting other people be charge of my happiness.  I do not need toxic people in my life, even if they are friends.

I still get into the sad mode when I feel I don't have friends adn I am not loved, but that's a deep rooted emotion and it will take time for me to get over that. (I have always known I need therapy, but talking about deep rooted emotional issues does not come easily to me.  Also because no one has even tried asking me or knowing what my issues are.)  So while I'm not there yet completely, I'll get there.  I'm on the right track.

I started to enjoy my own company and stopped depending on internet for my eternal source of happiness.  (internet still rules my list of things that make me happy, but it is now not the only thing on the list)  I go off to this Zen cafe near Sundervan or at Chocolate Room at S G Highway on my own.  With a book. (yes, got back to reading with a vengeance.)  These two places are near my house and I don't have to wade insane traffic to reach.  I'm usually found sitting in a corner in either of these cafes on Saturday evenings. It makes me happy.

I stopped making efforts to make other people happy.  Because other people's happiness is not my responsibility.  This may sound selfish to you, but it just made me less sad.  I spent so much time making sure I make other people happy that I even tolerated mildly toxic friendship which was a lot like me being friend with a dementor and it was sucking happiness out of me.  I think everyone of us has issues.  We all need to learn to deal with them without making other people's lives hell.  You have anger issues, deal with them.  I'm not taking no shit from anyone anymore.

And what I look for in new year? Well, more health, more happiness (because iPad and Nexus and of course, Kindle), career getting a direction (yay, more news).  These are the only things I can think of right now.

Also, anonymous gifts and fanmails and snail mails are more than welcome. <3 br="" nbsp="">


Devinder maheshwari said...

Okay, I enjoyed reading it. And let me ask you, what are your issues?

Nirwa Mehta said...

@ Devinder

hehe :) you are too kind. :) Am glad you liked reading it. :)

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